Andrea Gibson
Are you pushing away joy? Getting stuck in a cycle of anxiety and grief? World renowned spoken-word poet Andrea Gibson (they/them) can relate. In this powerful and personal episode, Andrea shares their battles with stage fright, extreme anxiety, chronic Lyme disease, and stage 4 ovarian cancer. They also explore the transformative experiences brought about by Andrea’s cancer diagnosis, taking ownership of their health, and their commitment to healing modalities that have given them a feeling of radiant health amidst the trials of chemotherapy. Andrea shares profound insights on love, authenticity, fear, gratitude, and the art of cherishing others and self in the harshest of life's storms - not just as a cancer patient, but as an undeniably resilient and wise human.
Powered by RedCircle
In this episode:
Coming to terms with their queer identity.
Living with extreme anxiety and panic attacks.
Overcoming stage fright and finding their voice in spoken-word poetry.
How suffering can transform into a path for liberation and healing.
Andrea's struggles with an incurable cancer diagnosis.
Healing modalities they pursued.
How self love has led to a new acceptance of their body and identity.
LINKS & RESOURCES:
Newsletter: Things That Don’t Suck
Website: www.andreagibson.org
Instagram: @andreagibson
TikTok: @andreagibsonpoetry
Facebook: Andrea Gibson Poetry
Twitter: @andreagibson
YouTube: Andrea Gibson Poetry
Wise Words:
Something about feeling like you've lost everything makes you braver.
I think that with poetry or any kind of writing, the biggest responsibility is to tell the truth. You come to it hoping to understand a new truth or somebody's truth.
I noticed that something was so different in me and I describe it as if my needing was gone. My wanting was gone. I no longer felt like I was in the world to get something. I felt like I was in the world to give
I stopped really caring about what was happening on the outside of who I am. And when I say on the outside of who I am, I also mean like the cancer is on the outside of who I am. My body in many ways is on the outside of who I am. The circumstances of life didn't bowl me over anymore.
You can't shut yourself off to grief without also shutting yourself off to joy.
One of the things that I realized after cancer was that there was one feeling that I was consistently pushing away, or more than one, I said joy initially but I was also pushing away awe. I was pushing away astonishment.
And I think that many of us, if we have trauma in our history, we don't feel safe with those emotions. I think that there are some things in our culture, and maybe even specifically in our culture for those of us on the left, whatever that means of where there can be an expectation for unhappiness.
The idea that if we're not in a constant state of grief or grieving what's happening in the world, then we're not empathetic people. We're not showing up to the world. I think there were lots of things intersecting with my lack of understanding that I wasn't actually welcoming joy. After cancer I saw it so clearly and I learned that joy, awe and astonishment are so accessible.
…in that office, I realized that it was the first time that I knew my health was in my hands, and it always had been. It was how I was framing the story. So I think I would have chosen all the same treatments prior because they had kept me alive for two years, but I never empowered myself to say I am making this decision.
As she said there's not a whole lot we can do for you, I almost felt like I had my life back in my hands. I had taken my power back, in a way.
One of the things that I had done since the beginning of my diagnosis was say I can make something beautiful out of this. I wrote about it once and said, “what kind of poet would I be if I could only make hard things beautiful on paper?”
A lot of what I've done is not be in resistance to the facts of my life.
I've really learned the difference between saying, “I forgive you life”, and “I thank you life.” Like when I stopped saying, “I forgive you life” for the hard things and I started saying, “I thank you life”, it transformed everything.